Tag Archives: women

WTF (Fostering)

21 Dec


I thought the title might be a draw.  For some reason, I always find that writing a post for WTHayley comes so much easier than writing a post for my business.  Maybe it’s because I feel I can be more ‘raw’, as opposed to more ‘professional’.  I initially started WTHayley because I felt the need to vent during a difficult time in my  life.  It was my outlet.  Now, Foster Inc. is my outlet and so WTHayley has sadly been pushed to the back burner and doesn’t get much action.

I felt the need to test my audience and see what gets more play, a blog on WTHayley or a blog post on Fostering101.com.  So, I’m pushing this out to both.  If you only follow me on one, feel free to sign up to follow me on the other…. and thank you in advance, it’s always fun to see the email opt-in’s no matter where they are coming from.

I fucking love December.  Not just because the smell of pine in my living room makes me feel warm and fuzzy or the twinkling lights outside that brighten up my home (sorry Rabbi), but more so because it means the end of one thing and the beginning of another.  While the school year and the Jewish New Year also give me a similar sense of a ‘fresh start’, January is a whole other animal.

I use December for myself and for my groups as a time to reflect, analyze and project.   We look at the highs, the lows, the lessons and the themes and then determine what we want to take with us into next year and what we want to leave behind. It’s like a cleanse, a facial scrub, a cold shower, a long run….  Whatever you want to relate to that makes you feel like you’ve hit the ‘refresh’ button.

But before we get ahead of ourselves, I’d like to share with you some of the insights and lessons learned from the women that I meet with monthly to ‘FOSTER’ their businesses.   Here are some of their lessons from 2016:

  • There’s no substitute for hard work
  • Be honest with yourself about what you’re capable of
  • Don’t over promise what you can’t deliver
  • Delegate, delegate, delegate
  • Trust is earned over time, not overnight
  • Don’t give away  your time, you’ll never get it back
  • Networking leads to a network and a network leads to growth
  • Embrace the people that need you
  • You can’t do it all on your own, so don’t try
  • Accept that everyone has a path.  Know what yours is.  Follow it where ever it may lead.
  • What you think you want and what you need may be different… and that’s ok
  • Be fluid…. not hard and fast
  • You can’t fix or change others, but you can advise, guide, support and if that doesn’t work you can move on
  • Make money on the things you know YOU KNOW instead of giving them away for free
  • Be Consistent
  • Show up
  • Be more discerning (Viveka)
  • Take Risks
  • Hire and surround yourself with great people
  • Hold people accountable, including yourself.  And if you can’t, find an accountability buddy.
  • Set boundaries
  • Consistency leads to effectiveness
  • Stay humble with success
  • Make time for yourSELF
  • Things always feel better in a community


So many great lessons for anyone at any level of business.

Now…. It’s your turn.

Look ahead to January as a time to step forward, outside of your comfort zone, and plan for the things that YOU WANT to achieve in the year ahead.  What did you learn in 2016?   What do you want to take forward into 2017?  If resolutions aren’t your thing, then just make a list, post it someone you can see it every day and set small attainable weekly or monthly goals that you can achieve.   Reward yourself for the small successes.   Don’t try to shoot for the moon – it’s pretty f’in far away, reach for the sky instead.

One thing I love to do that helps me is to use a visualization technique.  Sit down(in a quiet spot), close your eyes and think about your business as if it’s a year from now and you’ve had an amazing year…. Then ask yourself – what does that look like…. how did I get through this awesome year…. what steps did I take to get here…. what were my hurdles and what propelled me forward.   Write it down and use it in your planning process.  Let it motivate you.  It typically never happens that you talk yourself ‘OUT’ of what you want.

After doing this visualization myself, I’ve set up some great new programs for my business in 2017.  Just to give you a little tease…. watch out for  my ’12 Months of Fostering’ kicking off in Janaury, podcasts from women who have BTDT (been there done that), and ‘FosterWomen Success Stories’… just to name a few.   Sign up and stay tuned.  2017 is going to be an amazing year!

Happy and Healthy from WTHayley and Foster Inc.

WT Horney

16 Oct

Sorry if you’ve missed me.  Maybe I need more followers to feel the need to do more posts.  (Look to the right and sign up for the email version of my blog.  I promise I wont spam you)

(PS -I’m testing titles to see what generates more hits – stay tuned for the results.  I have a good feeling about this one)

I’ve had a few discussions recently with some girls friends, not to be named of course, and believe it or not, we talk about sex probably as much as men do.  However, when we discuss it, there is a huge discrepancy between the married sex life and the single sex life.  Single women don’t have a problem with ‘not wanting it’ because when they get it, they are happy to have it.  However, the married sex life for 99% of people that I know, is based on a few key things.  The woman wants it when…..  she’s in the mood, the credit card bill has arrived (I have one friend that refers to this as Amex-Sex) or it’s been so long that she’s got no choice but to do it or she’ll end up in an argument with her hubby.

And after polling a few ladies to find out exactly what it is that makes them want to have sex with their husbands, I’ve come to a few conclusions.  Guys, I know that I’ve got plenty of male fans out there that want to know how to get more sex out of their wives/girlfriends so you can thank me for this later.  (Ladies, don’t be angry with me this should help you out as well).  Here’s what I’ve uncovered.

There are a few categories that most, not all, married females fall into.  It’s all about women WANTING.  What do we want you ask?  Well, some of us want ‘things – material things, while others want things done for us – like helping out around the house, making arrangements or taking the kids off of our hands.  Then there are those of us that want to hear how good we look, how sexy we are or how much you ‘want’ us and don’t forgot those of us that want some physical connection – hand holding, a snuggle or smooch.  Last but not least are those of us that want to spend time with the ones we love.  Most importantly, is that you, as the MAN, need to know which category your significant other falls into.  While it’s not always about what WE want, it’s also about you not doing basically everything that YOU want to do.  Time at home, means time alone.  If you want some time to yourself guys, put in the time at home.  Not so hard.  Want to play poker one night?  Bring her some flowers(or expensive jewels), bathe the kids, tell her she looks pretty, plan a date night.  We’re not complicated if you can just figure us out.  Is that an oxymoron?  LOL.  Also, don’t be a dumb ass, know what the signs are for ‘I’m not in the fucking mood no matter what you do’.

WE ARE Cyclical:  Women are on a cycle, as you all very well know, and that gives us one week, give or take a few days, that we don’t want you near us.  While some of us use that as an excuse, it has been said that women are actually hornier when they are going through their cycle.  If your woman isn’t, then try her about 7-10 days later when she’s ovulating.  Our bodies are machines and our hormones ensure that we are giving off plenty of pheromones during the time we ovulate so that the male can sense it and come calling.  Some of you men, think you sense it all the time but that’s probably one of your issues.

In conclusion, spend some time tonight thinking about your ‘ significant other’ and trying to figure out what category they fit into.  It’s not just about us ladies, men fall into these categories too.


*Photo courtesy of Forbidden Fruit NYC