WT40

22 Aug

As I’m getting closer to 40 (trust me this is not the last you will hear about my impending milestone), I have to say I feel more and more that age is irrelevant.  I don’t feel almost-40 and I don’t think I look almost-40 (no comments on this please – I like living in denial).  Is it that we don’t see ourselves as our age or that because we surround ourselves with our peers, we don’t notice our age as much.  (Then again I work in an office with all 20-somethings but still feel like they are my peers).  Either way, my mentality for the next few months is F-40!!!!!

  • Age is just a number
  • You are only as old as you feel
  • Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are wine or cheese.

Last weekend while getting a trim in Roslyn at Salon Rock (this is a plug by the way), I was getting chatted up by the sweet and sexy Carlos the Columbian(not sure if this is his real name but that’s what I’m calling him to protect the innocent).  During our discussion about my plans for the weekend he asked me in the sweetest way possible ‘How Young Are You?’. Since I’m so quick witted, I responded with I’m 39 years young.  Suffice to say, he loved my retort and so began our intense discussion about age.

He was curious to know ‘how long do you plan on living’?  What?  Something I’ve never pondered before I jumped the gun and quickly said 80, later realizing SHIT, I’m half way there, something Don Juan also pointed out.   He compared my life to that of a motor vehicle stating, ‘if you buy a car and you know you’re going to have it for 20 years, after 10 years, knowing you’ve got 10 more years, how are you going to treat that car’?  Good fucking point.  And I totally agree.  I preach all the time that you need to ‘treat your body well and it will treat you well’.  It’s not every day we consider what our body automatically does for us without any effort.  All it needs is to be loved and cared for (and greased and oiled from time to time) and it will continue to do for you.  Too often we take things for granted  and most often we take our bodies for granted.  We abuse it with sun, bad food, chemicals, alcohol and lots of other crap we don’t even know we are putting into it.  Take a day or two and appreciate what it does for you and do something nice for it.  I didn’t mean to go off on another WTHealthy tangent but hopefully I gave you a little food for thought.

As the b-day gets closer, I’ll be reflecting on all of the amazing things I’ve done thus far in my life and all the things I’m putting on my bucket list for the years to come (promise to share at a later date).   I’m incredibly thankful for all the people that have come into and gone out of my life and for the memories we’ve had along the way.  Whether you’re 30, 40 or 50 we’ve all got one life to live – live happy!

As Oscar Wilde once said, “Experience is the name we give to our mistakes” or Abraham Lincoln – “In the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years”.

In the words of WTH, I’m not turning 40 – I’m 18 with 22 years of experience.  I’m sure I’ve just stolen someone else’s line but…..

WTH!

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WTHealthy

11 Aug

I know you’re not used to reading anything serious from me but I got this in an email and instead of forwarding to a few special people in my life, I figured I’d post for you all to see.  Everyday we hear about someone else that has cancer or has the cancer gene – people in their 20’s and 30’s are being affected  more and more, even children.  There are so many things we can incorporate into our lives day to day to help protect our bodies and avoid being another statistic.  I enjoyed reading this.  If you do as well, feel free to share the link. (I promise to follow this tomorrow or Monday with something much more entertaining :-))

Johns Hopkins Update
This is an extremely good article.

AFTER YEARS OF TELLING PEOPLE CHEMOTHERAPY IS THE ONLY WAY TO TRY (‘TRY’, BEING THE KEY WORD) TO ELIMINATE CANCER, JOHNS HOPKINS IS FINALLY STARTING TO TELL YOU THERE IS AN ALTERNATIVE WAY .

Cancer Update from Johns Hopkins:

1. Every person has cancer cells in the body. These cancer cells do not show up in the standard tests until they havemultiplied to a few billion. When doctors tell cancer patientsthat there are no more cancer cells in their bodies after treatment, it just means the tests are unable to detect the cancer cells because they have not reached the detectable
size.

2. Cancer cells occur between 6 to more than 10 times in a person’s lifetime.

3. When the person’s immune system is strong the cancer cells will be destroyed and prevented from multiplying and forming tumors.

4. When a person has cancer it indicates the person has
nutritional deficiencies. These could be due to genetic,
but also to environmental, food and lifestyle factors.

5. To overcome the multiple nutritional deficiencies, changing diet to eat more adequately and healthy, 4-5 times/day and by including supplements will strengthen the immune system.

6. Chemotherapy involves poisoning the rapidly-growing
cancer cells and also destroys rapidly-growing healthy cells in the bone marrow, gastrointestinal tract etc., and can cause organ damage, like liver, kidneys, heart, lungs etc.

7. Radiation while destroying cancer cells also burns, scars and damages healthy cells, tissues and organs.

8. Initial treatment with chemotherapy and radiation will often reduce tumor size. However prolonged use of chemotherapy and radiation do not result in more tumor destruction.

9. When the body has too much toxic burden from
chemotherapy and radiation the immune system is either
compromised or destroyed, hence the person can succumb to various kinds of infections and complications.

10. Chemotherapy and radiation can cause cancer cells to
mutate and become resistant and difficult to destroy.
Surgery can also cause cancer cells to spread to other sites.

11. An effective way to battle cancer is to starve the cancer cells by not feeding it with the foods it needs to multiply.

*CANCER CELLS FEED ON:

a. Sugar substitutes like NutraSweet, Equal, Spoonful, etc. are made with Aspartame and it is harmful. A better natural substitute would be Manuka honey or molasses, but only in very small amounts. Table salt has a chemical added to make it white in color Better alternative is Bragg’s aminos or sea salt.

b. Milk causes the body to produce mucus, especially in the gastro-intestinal tract. Cancer feeds on mucus. By cutting off milk and substituting with unsweetened soy milk cancer cells are being starved.

c. Cancer cells thrive in an acid environment. A meat-based
diet is acidic and it is best to eat fish, and a little other meat, like chicken. Meat also contains livestock antibiotics, growth hormones and parasites, which are all harmful, especially to people with cancer.

d. A diet made of 80% fresh vegetables and juice, whole
grains, seeds, nuts and a little fruits help put the body into an alkaline environment. About 20% can be from cooked food including beans. Fresh vegetable juices provide live enzymes that are easily absorbed and reach down to cellular levels within 15 minutes to nourish and enhance growth of healthy cells. To obtain live enzymes for building healthy cells try and drink fresh vegetable juice (most vegetables including bean sprouts) and eat some raw vegetables 2 or 3 times a day. Enzymes are destroyed at temperatures of 104 degrees F (40 degrees C)..

e. Avoid coffee, tea, and chocolate, which have high
caffeine Green tea is a better alternative and has cancer
fighting properties. Water-best to drink purified water, or
filtered, to avoid known toxins and heavy metals in tap
water. Distilled water is acidic, avoid it.

12. Meat protein is difficult to digest and requires a lot of
digestive enzymes. Undigested meat remaining in the
intestines becomes putrefied and leads to more toxic buildup.

13. Cancer cell walls have a tough protein covering. By
refraining from or eating less meat it frees more enzymes
to attack the protein walls of cancer cells and allows the
body’s killer cells to destroy the cancer cells.

14. Some supplements build up the immune system
(IP6, Flor-ssence, Essiac, anti-oxidants, vitamins, minerals, EFAs etc.) to enable the body’s own killer cells to destroy cancer cells.. Other supplements like vitamin E are known to cause apoptosis, or programmed cell death, the body’s normal method of disposing of damaged, unwanted, or unneeded cells.

15. Cancer is a disease of the mind, body, and spirit.

A proactive and positive spirit will help the cancer warrior
be a survivor. Anger, un-forgiveness and bitterness put
the body into a stressful and acidic environment. Learn to
have a loving and forgiving spirit. Learn to relax and enjoy life.

16. Cancer cells cannot thrive in an oxygenated
environment. Exercising daily, and deep breathing help to
get more oxygen down to the cellular level. Oxygen therapy is another means employed to destroy cancer cells.

1. No plastic containers in micro.

2. No water bottles in freezer.

3. No plastic wrap in microwave..

Johns Hopkins has recently sent this out in its newsletters. This information is being circulated at Walter Reed Army Medical Centeras well. Dioxin chemicals cause cancer, especially breast cancer. Dioxins are highly poisonous to the cells of our bodies. Don’t freeze your plastic bottles with water in them as this releases dioxins from the plastic. Recently, Dr Edward Fujimoto, Wellness Program Manager at Castle Hospital , was on a TV program to explain this health hazard. He talked about dioxins and how bad they are for us. He said that we should not be heating our food in the microwave using plastic containers. This especially applies to foods that contain fat. He said that the combination of fat, high heat, and plastics releases dioxin into the food and ultimately into the cells of the body. Instead, he recommends using glass, such as Corning Ware, Pyrexor ceramic containers for heating food. You get the same results, only without the dioxin. So such things as TV dinners, instant ramen and soups, etc., should be removed from the container and heated in something else. Paper isn’t bad but you don’t know what is in the paper. It’s just safer to use tempered glass, Corning Ware, etc. He reminded us that a while ago some of the fast food restaurants moved away from the foam containers to paper The dioxin problem is one of the reasons.

Also, he pointed out that plastic wrap, such as Saran, is just as dangerous when placed over foods to be cooked in the microwave. As the food is nuked, the high heat causes poisonous toxins to actually melt out of the plastic wrap and drip into the food. Cover food with a paper towel instead.

PLEASE PASS THIS ON!!!!

Free Refills

11 Jul

Why is it more people have not heard of this phrase?  I’d love to give a shout out to the person that introduced me to it but for the life of me, I can’t remember.  If you want to stake your claim, feel free to do so in the comment section of this post.  I’m happy to give credit where credit is due.

Let me explain.  A friend was sharing a story the other morning on the train about a girl that had claimed she had sex with him in college.  The guy on the other hand, was 100% certain that he had never touched her.  Not because she was ugly or anything – it just never happened.  As a side not, I’m not quite sure what girl claims to have sex with someone she actually never had sex with – like a self proclaimed slut – Weirder?   Anyway, this guy runs into the girl again a few years later – he’s single/she’s single.  Uh-huh!!!!  He’s thinking… this should be easy – she already thinks she had sex with me so either she wants to ‘fulfill the lie’ or she enjoyed it so much in her imagination that she’ll want it again.  So I said ‘Ha, who doesn’t want a free refill???‘  CRICKETS.  Nobody, among the 6 person train crew, knew WTH a free refill was, so I explained….

FREE REFILL – having intercourse with someone you’ve already intercoursed with.
Explanation: You don’t have to count it again.  Not another ‘notch on your belt’, ‘name on your list’, whatever you call want to call it.  It’s a repeat, a do-over, a freebie – hence, it’s a Free Refill.

The train crew loved it so much that they felt I should share my catch phrase with the rest of the world (or my 150 FB fans).  I’m not sure Free Refills are that big of a deal these days but the older you get, the harder they are to find.

-WTH

P.S. Stay Tuned…. Tough Mudder is on Saturday.  I’ll be Tweeting up a storm pre and post race.  Not sure my phone will make it through the mud.  If you don’t currently follow me, you can start now by clicking this link: https://twitter.com/hayleybyer

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Wax On, Wax Off

27 Jun

Finding your Vaginal Stylist is sort of like dating.  You may need to expose yourself to a FEW, before you find THE ONE.

The Backstory: About 10 years ago, I gave up my razor and was talked into trying out the world of waxing.  With no experience, I jumped right in to the hard core world of the Brazillian bitches known as The J Sisters.  It was Valentine’s day and I was feeling sexy and romantic with my then boyfriend of 3 months.  I thought as part of my gift (what do you really give a guy for Valentines day – other than good sex after only three months), I would take the plunge.  I ventured out of work a little early that evening and headed over.  The waiting room was overflowing with ladies all having similar plans for their vag’s that night.  The wait went on forever.  I tried to read the faces of the women exiting the rooms but mostly they were straight faced or suffering from shock as I would later learn.  Finally it was my turn.  I was sweating with fear.  My J Sister, whom I later learned was not really a sister but a cousins cousin of some sort, did not smile, did not make small talk and ushered me into a tiny room with a table.  I already felt betrayed.  In her thick accent she asked ‘vhat du you vhant? Ju Vhant me to tak it all ovf?’.  Having grown up in a house with a British mother, I have a good ear for understanding people’s thick accents so I simply replied ‘yes please’.

She told me to get up on the table and put both legs staight up in the air – jesus, good thing I work out.  She began her procedure of applying the hot wax.  Without any sort of warning, she affixed a strip of paper on top of the wax and ripped off what felt like the entire left side of my lower body.  Fuuuucccckkkkkk!!!!!  was the only thing I could manage to get out of my mouth.  At that moment, I sat up and told her I didn’t need the other side done and that my boyfriend would be happy either way.  She coaxed me into staying and having her finish the job.  She said she would be more gentle and didn’t realize I was of virgin status.  After feeling like I’d been torn to pieces, I left the building vaginally violated and robbed of $65.  A tip was out of the fucking question.

After a hot shower and lots of lotion,  I met my boyfriend for our romantic Valentines day dinner, unsure how any action would be taking place down there later that night.  Hot and Throbbing and not in a good way.  While waiting for our table, he presented me with the gift he had bought me for the occasion – awwhhh so sweet of him, I thought.  What do you know, a 10 pack of bikini waxes from the fucking J Sisters.  I almost fainted.  WTH!

My next experience was much more pleasant.  I discovered a woman named Natasha.  She was a gem.  Not only does she take her time and is very personable but she teaches you a breathing technique that makes the entire experience more palatable.   I spent years with her until she became geographically undesirable.  During her relocation, I also relocated to Long Island and felt the need to find a local establishment.  I tried my luck at a few places – high end (Estee Lauder), low end (some freaky Russian woman at the Wharf), nail salons with added services (they should stick to nails).  Bikini Waxing on Long Island was sadly not a skill many people had.  The search continued.

I was close to picking the razor back up and then it happened.  I hired girls in their 20’s that knew much more than I did.  Some genius had invented a thicker, herbal, organic wax that didn’t pull hair and skin off at the same time.  And so became my new vaginal discovery – UniK Wax.  Trust me, your V’jayjay will thank me.  http://www.unikwax.com/  (This in not a paid advertisement in any way – just sharing some WTHayley-Wisdom).

-WTHayley

P.S.  Every time I look at the picture above, I crack up because it looks like little stick figures with weird heads and the bottom one – headless.

A Day of WTHayley

20 Jun

20120621-083610.jpg

When people say “How was your day?”, do you ever really tell them how your day was or do you just give the typical response of “It was good”? Someone asked me this yesterday and it got me thinking about how my day really was and what it entailed. I then outlined my day in my head and thought I’d share this fun, slightly long, poem with you.

3am I hear a noise
Jack just tripped on all her toys
Getting up to make a pee
Once again, waking me
Back in bed and fall asleep
6am I hear a peep
The 4 yr old is getting up
She wants some milk in her cup
Leave me alone, I still have time
Milky Milky, she starts to wine
I stand my ground and make her wait
6:30 alarm, I can’t be late

Out of bed, shower and dress
Make the bed and clean the mess
Kids are playing, I make their beds
Brushes their teeth and comb their heads
Marley wants to wear a dress
It’s only 62, I try to stress
A dress she wants and starts to mope
I pick my battles to try and cope
Get them dressed and down the stairs
Pick out breakfast, “Get in your chairs”
Cereal for them and Coffee for me
My ride is here, kisses and leave

Get on train with my morning crew
Try to talk about something new
Open ipad, Words with Friends
This fucking game, it never ends
Need new Blog, I start to write
Writers Block, I’ll try tonight

Get to Penn and begin my stroll
Pick up ‘Bucks and Egg on Roll
Get to office, first one there
Eat my food, fix my hair
Check my email, lots of spam
Another client in a Jam
Make some calls and start the day
Check my Facebook, then music I play

Meetings, meetings back to back
Ugh, so glad I packed a snack
Status meeting starts at One
Another meeting, need to run
Tell the staff to do their work
Get on phone and yell at Jerk
3:00 I’m feeling beat
Holy shit, I forgot to eat
Finish work to catch the 5pm
Running late, Rush to Penn
Find a seat and hitch a ride
Home to girls, smiles so wide

Play some games, read some books
Dress up time with fancy looks
Brush their teeth and make them Pee
If not, 3am, Jack i’ll see
Tuck them into their warm beds
Give them kisses on their heads
Read 3 books and still want more
Good night moon or Fancy Nancy’s galore
7:30 – Kids in bed and lights are dim
Change my clothes and head to gym
Treadmill, stairs and lift some weight
Ugh, I’m tired, it’s getting late
Need to hit the Stop and Shop
Out of juice and Ice Pop
9:00 – Make some dinner, clean the dish
No work emails? Yeah right, I wish

Pack kids lunches, shower and shave
Jacks out of bed, she doesn’t behave
Back to compter, make To-Do list
Now Marley’s up, I’m getting pissed
Finally they’re down and out
I’m getting sleepy, and worn out
11:30 – Get in bed for 30 Rock
Don’t forget to set the clock
Head on pillow, hit the hay
And wake tomorrow for another day.

–WTH

Firm or Limp?

18 Jun

What’s the first thing you do when you meet someone new?  Reach out your hand and give them a shake, right?  And what goes through your mind when the hand reaching back to you is as flappy and limp as skirt steak?

What does a handshake say about a personality or character?  A lot more than you think it does.

RIGHT                                                                                            WRONG

Men: There is nothing sexy about a man that doesn’t shake a womans hand with a firm grip.  Unless you’re going medieval on us and you’re going to raise it to your lips and kiss it, if you aren’t giving a firm solid shake, you’re are either lacking self confidence, have no dignity or someone’s cut your balls off.  The exception to this rule is if you’re meeting an elderly woman who seems a little frail, go lighter on her but not too light, you don’t want grandma thinking some woman has emasculated you.

What about the man with the handshake that’s a little too harsh?  Is he trying to overcompensate for some other shortcoming?  (Hmmmm) Trying to make you feel beneath him?  Does he even realize he’s giving you his kung fu grip?  Men, I’m curious to hear your answers to this one.  What exactly are you trying to prove when you try to crush a woman’s hand during a shake?

And ladies, it’s the dawn of a new age.  Men aren’t kissing your hand so when you reach out, whether you’re shaking a man or woman’s hand, don’t hand them the tips of your limp little fingers… get in there, grab it, show some strength and be FIRM, make eye contact and don’t hold it for more than a few seconds.   (I’m still referring to the handshake here)  If you are in the business world, even more of a reason – show you’ve got some balls.  G-d didn’t give us a penis to hold, so you’d better be able to hold your own.  (Pun very much intended)

Speaking of ladies holding their own, years ago when I was in the advertising world, I discovered what I still refer to as my Work Bible.  It was a book written by a very funny author named Karen Salmansohn.  The book was titled “How to succeed in business without a Penis”.  If you’re a working woman (and can handle the overuse of the word Penis), no matter what age, do yourself a favor a get this book – you’ll be doing Karen a favor too since I’m not sure how many people are still reading it.  It’s funny, enlightening and educational.  This has been my public service announcement of today.

— WTHayley

Kismet

30 May

Kismet, Fate, Destiny…  Do people come into your life to serve a purpose?   What about objects?  Did you ever think about something and then all of a sudden it appeared in front of you like you were meant to find it at that exact moment?

I happen to be a believer.  I also think that I have a sixth sense but that’s something we can save for another discussion.  In regards to the idea that people and objects could be part of fate, I believe that the letters that strangely showed up on my Words with Friends board were meant to be?

Don’t tell me this hasn’t happened to you at least once?   I’ve been incredibly bored by my games on WWF these days and if you’re one of the lucky 25 people that I currently have games going with, you’ll see that you are crushing me.  I’m sorry if you thought that it was due to your incredible word building strategy but the fact is, I’m completely over it.  So much so, last week I started a game with a friend and we decided to make it interesting.  The new rule for our game is that you can only use words relating to sex.  I know, ridiculous, but I commute and what the hell else is there to do when you have nobody to talk to (no offense to my morning train crew – you know eventually you all get bored with the conversation as well).  This game has been a great form of entertainment for me(don’t knock it till you try it).  The best part is that we rate each other, not on points, but based on the word and how it gets put it to use in the Chat section of our game.  The last few plays have been great and the letters I have right now are completely hysterical.
Play 1: BUM
Play 2: BIT
Play 3: TIT
My letters: YOWENIE

I wish I could make this shit up.  I have included a picture of the game board for your viewing pleasure.  I would say that YO WENIE is Kismet. Now all I have to do is figure out where to put it. (On the board you sick people) 🙂
One other thing to mention regarding my sometimes boring commute.  I’m sure this woman is not reading my blog but I’d like her to know this….. it’s not ok if you are 18 years old and commuting into the city with your parents on the train at 8am and reading 50 Shades of Grey.  What made it even worse was when you stood up as the train stopped, turned to your parents and you “Ugh, I’m sweating!”.  Really?

-WTHayley

WT-PMS

16 May

Yes, I’m premenstrual and it’s got me thinking. (Men, don’t stop reading – consider this your free education session – you might learn something useful).

Is it not bad enough that we have to deal with getting our period every month?Worse than that, is all the crap that comes along with it – bloating, breast tenderness, food cravings, headaches, less tolerance for noises/lights/people, fatigue, feeling sad and hopeless, mood swings, poor judgement, feeling slow/sluggish/lethargic and loss of sex drive.  I’m not sure which of these would be classified as the worst symptoms to endure but depending on who you ask, each woman would give you a different opinion.  What amazes me, is that most men (and some women) have yet to learn how to deal with a woman with PMS. Having a business partner who’s cycle goes to the extreme(thankfully she’s not PMSing as I write this), I thought I’d share some advice with you.

Here’s a short list of the fun stuff women go through every 23-28 days:

Symptom: Bloating
What SHE might say:  I feel so fat!!! or Does my ass look huge in this?
What you should NOT say: You are looking a little puffy or You might want to put on something else.
Possible result: TEARS

Symptom: Breast Tenderness
What SHE might say: My boobs are killing me
What YOU should NOT say:  Want me to massage them?  (the last thing we want you doing when our boobs hurt is touching them)
Possible Result: SMACK in the Face

Symptom:  Headache
What SHE might say: Honey, I have such a headache or I think I have a brain tumor (it recently took me 3 months to realize that every 3-4 weeks my excruciating headache was linked to my period.  Thankfully, I talked myself out of getting an MRI).
What you should NOT say: Oh, that excuse again.
Definite Result: No Sex

Symptom:  Mood Swings
What SHE might say: The list here is endless.  Basically, anything off beat that she doesn’t normally say that includes a heightened level of drama or emotion.
What YOU should say: Anything you can think of that will make her feel better, less emotional and more secure
What you should NOT say: Anything that will get you in the dog house.  You may just want to stand there and smile sweetly like a Mute.  Bringing home flowers might help too.  Wouldn’t kill you men to do that every once in a while.
Possible Result: Death stare or Stabbing

Symptom:  Lack of Sex Drive
What SHE might say: Get the fuck off of me or Go Fuck YOURSELF
What YOU should say: Ok, I will.  (Then leave the room as quickly as possible.  Grab some lotion and a towel on your way out.)
What you should NOT say: I think we should talk about our lack of a sex life, unless you count the weeks you were reading those 50 Shades books. (Sorry, couldn’t possibly have a post without mentioning it.)
Possible Result:  NO SEX EVER AGAIN

A few other tips and tidbits:

— PMS can last anywhere from 5 – 11 days before the cycle begins – fun fun fun.

— If you’re in an office (or prison cell) with more than 5 women, most cycles will sync to the dominant woman in the office.  Shockingly, that’s not me in my office.  The scientific term for this is Menstrual Synchrony or the McClintock Effect.  (I swear, look it up on wiki).

— Don’t try to have difficult conversations or conversations in general that would fall above a 3 on the difficulty scale, especially if you’re hoping to get your way.  Chances are, she will beat you down and come close to stabbing you if you push her too far.  I’ve actually heard (and I don’t have a true source to reference on this so take it with a grain of salt) that you could use PMS as a defense tactic if you hurt or kill someone during your cycle.  Again, conduct your own research before you consider doing anything rash.

—  Don’t ask for sex, unless you want to lose a limb.  If she wants it, she’ll come to you.  I have heard that some women are more aroused once their period begins but every woman is different so try to find out if this is the case with your significant other.   See previous statement about avoiding difficult conversations.

For my female readers, here are a few tips for dealing with your PMS (keep in mind I do my research on google and have no formal medical degree):
— Go on vacation.  Just kidding.  Nobody wants to be in a bathing suit when their monthly friend is in town.
— Drink plenty of fluids (not soda or caffeine) – helps reduce bloating.  Nobody mentioned avoiding alcohol so feel free to drink as much wine as you like.
— Eat frequent small meals, avoid overeating – this mean you can eat chocolate cookies, chocolate bars or anything containing chocolate about every 3 hours throughout the day
— Take Supplements – Vitamin B6, Calcium and Magnesium.  Tryptophan, found in diary can also help.
— Exercise – Endorphins, Endorphins, Endorphins.  They also make you horney. FYI.

One last note to leave you with: (some of it’s funny and some of it’s stupid)

— WTHayley

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Dirty Girls Finish

8 May

As you may know, this past weekend I attended the Tough Mudder at Mount Snow, VT as a spectator.  Here are some of the things I learned…

Still working on a team name.  Here are some ideas:
Dirty Girls Finish
Slippery When Wet
Muddy Bizatches and Beaus
Filthy Milfs
Dirty Dashing Divas
Muddy Princesses
Dirty Mudder Luvers
Muff Tudders
Mud Queens
No Sissies Here
Muddy Daughters
Schmutz Lovers

Feel free to make recommendations in the comments section below.  No need to keep it clean, we certainly wont.

— WTHayley

Getting Drilled

3 May

I’ve just spent my morning getting drilled, injected, poked and having my mouth stuffed with multiple apparatuses.  No, this is not the fourth edition to 50 Shades.  This is the endless torture I have been enduring for the last three months having had two root canals, two new crowns made and a filling replaced.  While my dentist is possibly the nicest man on the planet and not a bad bone in his body, I absolutely despise him.  The torture he’s put me through, all the while making cute little jokes that I can’t laugh at because my mouth is cranked open, his hands are halfway down my throat with an oversized spoon holding my tongue out of the way and I’m upside down with blood rushing to my brain.  It must suck being in a profession that no matter how nice or sweet or funny you are, none of your customers ever want to really see you because they know they are in for a miserable experience.  Sorry Dr. G – get a new gig.

On a lighter note, a few friends and I along with 17,000 people will be heading up to VT tomorrow to ‘spectate’ or possibly set up our own Ab Judging Competition at the New England Tough Mudder.  The latter obviously being much more fun and potentially painless.  Large bellied men that miss the toilet need not apply.  The weekend should be interesting – good weather, athletic people with bruised egos and broken bones and of course lots and lots of parties for Cinco de Mayo – Woohoo.  I hope to have some fun blogging fodder come Monday.. or if you’re lucky, I’ll try blogging and tweeting all weekend.

Stay tuned.  (I most likely wont be sober so please excuse all terseness and typos)

And pleaseeeeeee, move your mouse over to the right and click FOLLOW!!!!  Or follow me on Twitter @hayleybyer but be patient, I truly have no idea how the whole tweeting thing works.  Good thing I’ll be with some social media gurus.

WTHayley

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